Oswin Henry Evans’ Birth Day. (4th Oct 2007)

I suppose Oswins Birth story should begin on 6th September when I had my first sleepless night due to contractions. I was getting contractions every 15 minutes and emptying my bowels from about 12am until 7am, when the children started to get up wanting breakfast and the contractions stopped completely. I had similar experiences on the 9th September, 11th September, 18th September, 21st September and 1st October. Obviously I was quite tired and spent many of the last days of my pregnancy coping with disappointment each time the labour stopped. This was difficult but not as difficult as having to face people and listen to their comments and jokes about my size and when I was going to ‘let the baby come out’ etc.
I was also given ample advice about various method of inducing labour which of course all ‘work every time’! Here are the ones we tried:
A hot curry, a hot bath, a hot bath with clary sage, a brisk walk, a jog, walking sideways up the stairs (!), raspberry leaf tea, strong coffee, aromatherapy massages (using oils made up for me by Lin), nipple stimulation, (in the form of breast feeding Amaris), sex and finally reflexology.
Nigel contacted Lesley, (the reflexologist), the weekend before Oswin was born but she was unhappy about helping in case of complications. However, she got back in touch on the Tuesday after she had researched reflexology as a method of inducing labour. We arranged an appointment for Wednesday afternoon and reluctantly took the children ice skating on Wednesday morning. This was a good decision as we were able to avoid most of the people we didn’t want to see and spent lots of time with friends who were able to sympathise and make helpful comments that helped us to feel much better, especially hearing how many people went way over their due dates.
Reflexology went well. I asked Lesley to use the last of the oils that Lin mixed for me. Lesley said that everything was perfectly healthy I just had lots on my mind and I was quite constipated. I already knew this but hearing it put my mind at rest. After my treatment I went to the toilet several times and went to bed feeling much more comfortable and relaxed.
The Labour.
I was awoken during the early hours of the morning with some good strong contractions. After the 3rd one I checked the clock. It was 5:30am. This seemed like a very reasonable hour and so I decided to get up. At this point I felt positive and refreshed, mainly because Sol had slept well for 2 or 3 nights previous.
I went downstairs and made myself a pot of raspberry leaf tea, I was determined to maintain good contractions this time. When the rest of the family joined me we took photographs of us to mark the momentous occasion, the last time our family photos would only contain 5 people! Nigel took a picture of me and the children and then set the timer to take one of all of us. During which time I had another contraction and my face was bright red for that photo!!
We carried on as normal until lunchtime when I settled myself upstairs because I felt that the contractions were getting extremely strong. A short while later I asked Nigel to call his Mom to help with the children because I felt like I needed Nigel’s support. She arrived within minutes.
The contractions continued to get stronger and closer together for the next few hours. Nigel was wonderful and kept me well topped up on rescue remedy, homeopathy and phytobiosphysics. I was continually asking for reassurance because I felt that the labour was so much more intense than I remembered the others being. Nigel also reminded me to remain active, for most of the labour I chose to have one contraction whilst sitting on the toilet and one standing up holding on to Nigel. Nigel helped me to stay focused and his confidence in me made me feel energised during the early stages.
It was probably about 4pm when I asked Nigel to make sure the children stayed out because I felt I no longer had any control over the intensity of the contractions and I knew I would be bearing down soon. I want to say more about the effect the contractions were having on me but it is so difficult to explain. For a start I knew that he was going to be a big baby because I felt that the birth canal was filled to agonising capacity which really frightened me. And with each contraction I felt my entire body contract with my uterus. I am used to having a midwife scream ‘one last push before the contraction finishes’ and each time I’ve decided whether I want to give one last push or not. Usually not! But this time I had no choice my body took over and my mind panicked. I shouted and grunted like a wounded animal, but in my defence I have never had such a painful, intense labour before and hope to never have one like it again! Nigel had to ask me to get off the toilet because he noticed how fierce the contractions had become. I think he was afraid I’d give birth into the toilet. However, I really didn’t want to because each contraction was bringing a bowel movement! He was right to be concerned though because it was only minutes later that Oswin arrived!
At one point with my head swimming and my body reeling, I was holding onto the bathroom sink whilst Nigel did a wonderful job of strategically putting pressure on my back, I remember crying out ‘wait’. I’m not sure who to, perhaps the baby, but I was just so desperate for 2 minutes break. Nigel rightly interpreted this to mean I was starting to flag and advised me to get on all fours to slow the process a little. However, I didn’t feel I could have shut my legs enough to put both knees on the floor and only managed one knee and one foot, well, tip toes actually. It wasn’t until afterwards that we realised I had dreamt about giving birth in this position weeks ago but I’d dismissed it because I hadn’t ever considered this position before and had no intention of giving birth in the bathroom!
At one point I could here Kath reading to the children and each time I shouted she raised her voice until by the end of the contraction she was shouting to muffle my cries! I remember thinking ‘this would be funny if it didn’t hurt so much!’
I soon decided that even though I was certain I was about to tear I had to just do whatever I had to get the baby out safely. Nigel began giving me a commentary on what he could see. This was extremely helpful especially because I wasn’t sure he was coming out right. Nigel explained that the head was crowning and then that he could see his forehead. At some point around now Nigel encouraged me to feel for myself and I was amazed at how odd the fluffy little head felt. But I was able to satisfy my concerns. Nigel continued to comment, ‘his eyes are out…..I can see his ears’ etc. he instructed me when to breathe, pant etc to ensure minimal tearing. He did well because even after all that I only grazed and didn’t require any stitches! Yay!
Another odd sensation I have never experienced was when the baby began to turn to manoeuvre the shoulder out. In the past a midwife has turned the baby with much discomfort. But this time Oswin gently began twisting round until I felt one last intense pain which was obviously a shoulder squeezing through before a huge gush of water pushed him free and into Daddies hands. I snatched a glimpse and instinctively knew he was beautiful, whole and complete and so I was able to spend a few precious moments recovering!!! This was a nice feeling because I knew hew was safe with Nigel rather than feeling the need to snatch the baby from the midwife quickly!! I think at this point Nigel asked me if I wanted to sit down. I answered 'No' and asked him to pass me the baby and help me to the bedroom. Nigel couldn't work out how we could do this without me stepping over the cord, but I asked him to pass him through my legs. He did and then we had an odd wobbly walk to the bedroom, past all of the fluid and meconium on the bathroom floor. I remember feeling shocked that I couldn't walk upright with him because the cord was too short. I was reluctant to tug on it for fear I'd do some damage and so Nigel just supported me as I limped to the bedroom. Wanted to rest somewhere I wouldn’t have to move from for a while, I really needed to rest. At this point the children and Kath rushed to the bottom of the stairs, they had heard him cry and were asking if they would come and see him. I asked them to give me a moment because I wanted to settle first. as soon as I was in bed Nigel called them in. the all had a hold , (which was an odd sensation because the cord was still attached), and Nigel took some pictures. In all the excitement I realised we'd forgotten to check the time of birth. I'd given birth in the only room without a clock! Fortunately my mother-in-law checked her watch the moment she heard him cry and informed us it was 5:10pm.
Nigel then called the hospital to tell them about Oswins arrival. At the time I wasn't sure what was happening but it was obvious that the telephone conversation wasn't going brilliantly. The midwife Nigel spoke to wanted me to go into hospital because I hadn't yet delivered the placenta, (minutes after birth!?!), Nigel argued my case wonderfully but they still sent paramedics in an ambulance with sirens and flashing lights etc!
We were determined not to go into hospital after everything we'd been through. I felt that it would endanger us both as it was early evening and taking the baby out would cause his temperature to drop and making me walk down the stairs before I’d delivered my placenta could be dangerous too. I knew that if we agreed to go to hospital we'd have to staying due to complications that they had caused.
When the paramedics arrived we asked the children to leave as the room was really crowded. later, I found out that Sol was crying, concerned that the paramedics were going to hurt me! :o(
They were nice however, and obviously didn't want a confrontation. upon arrival she asked if I’d delivered the placenta and when I said no they said they would have to take me to hospital as I'd only got 20 minutes from birth to deliver it! I told them I knew it took up to 2 hours and they agreed to just wait with me until a midwife arrived. we then sat and had a conversation about how useless midwives are until 40 minutes after birth when the I delivered the placenta, whole and healthy and...easy!
the midwife arrived a short while after, by which time I felt much more in control and confident. after a rather rough internal examination,( bitch !), after which she concluded that I was grazed and if I was in hospital they might put me a stitch but as there was no gas and air handy it would be too difficult! (I wouldn't have had any anyway!), the children came back in. The midwife continued hr checks etc. while we all admired the baby some more. We decided to ignore her as much as possible because intervention had once again threatened to turn a wonderful, glorious celebration into a nightmare!
I'll never involve the midwifery services gin, should we ever choose to have more children. Still alls well that ends well, and we certainly live and learn. What a fabulous experience and whatever else happens I'll be forever in Nigel debt for all of his care, he was calm and reassuring throughout despite having concerns himself. and because he knows me so well he knew that despite my hysterics I still didn't want a midwife present or any intervention. I'd chosen to give birth to my baby as nature intended and it was miraculous.
We spend many days talking about how amazing the whole experience was and we realised an amazing thing. I reminded Nigel that I'd dreamt about giving birth in the bathroom on one knee and one foot and that is how it happened. Nigel explained in detail what he saw and told me that when his head was first visible it looked like puckered skin. This scared him because he thought that the cord was coming first which would have resulted in the baby suffocating. However he gave it a prod and realised it was his head. It was just that the way the bones overlap to fit through the birth canal had caused the skin to pucker up! Phew. He then remembered another dream I’d had which really scared me at the time where the baby told me that when he was born there would be some issue with the top of his head and that I shouldn't worry. I did worry though and so put it to the back of my mind, but we now knew what it all meant!
The whole experience was really spiritual and well worth it! He is amazing baby.

I had an appointment at the opticians this afternoon and I decided to ask Angel to come along with me. Despite the fact that we share plenty of quality time together we really don’t get enough time just the two of us. We had a nice giggle together, especially because at one point she couldn’t resist shouting out the letters that I couldn’t see! She then helped me choose some new frames and much to my surprise she was actually a good help. Of curse she wanted me to try all of the really girly pink ones and the ones with a playboy bunny on the lenses which I truly despised but I suppose girls will be girls. In the end with the help of the assistant we found a pair which I thought were daringly different to my old ones but still suited my odd face shape!
We then ran a few errands at the local shops and returned home and watched Sesame Street with the younger ones who had had a nice time with Daddy while we were away reading story books.
Most of the rest of the day was filled with tidying and sorting all of the junk in the house. We seem to be in constant need of a junk room in which to dump all of our crap and without this assigned room the whole house is a tip. I took it easy although Nigel worked like Trojan and his back is sore again now, which is a worry because he is gardening all day tomorrow!
I am currently reading a book called Unassisted Childbirth by Laura Kaplan Shaley. It is full of useful advice and statistics etc. about the safety of unassisted homebirths as opposed to hospital deliveries. I am toughly enjoying it but so far am only half way through. I am trying to reading it quicker so that Nigel will also get chance to look at it before the big day.
Speaking of which I have noticed that I getting quite a lot of twinges now. And my attention has been on the birth almost constantly. I am truly excited about it especially after the great NCT ante-natal classes. There are still some breast feeding classes to come so will have other things to look forward to.
I think that the tension is mounting slightly for the children as we approach the due date. HRH seems to be especially sensitive and as usual is showing by not sleeping very well! Fortunately Nigel is ensuring that if we have a disturbed night I get at least some rest if not a nap during the day. Bless him!
All in all I feel good. I am very aware of the huge weight in my pelvis but we shall find out more about the positioning of the baby tomorrow when we go to the midwife appointment! Wish me luck!

Wow, I'm in week 35 now and I haven't blogged for ages. Whoops! The reason for his however, is because I haven't really had anything to report. All has been going extremely well. I am loving being pregnant and the baby is wonderfully active, giving me absolutely no cause for concern. However, my Dad had a heart attack on Friday 17th August which believe it or not was actually one year to the day since I was induced to deliver the baby we lost! He came out of hospital yesterday and is thankfully on the mend now, but obviously we've really had our work cut out this week. It's been crazy, what with hospital visits, doing his washing and of course insane amount of stress! The children have been great but there was no under sixteens allowed on the ward and so they have been unable to see him since the heart attack and they've been quite concerned and eager to check he still is the same old Grandad. Angel in particular remembers my step Moms death about 18 months ago, in which she went into hospital and died before she ever came home again, so Angel was cheering for joy when I said he was being allowed to leave the hospital.
Last Saturday was the first NCT ante-natal class. The venue is child friendly and so our children were able to come along too. Saturdays class talked about various positions during birth and the way they can help with pain relief. We talked about previous birth experiences and how our other children will fit in and cope with the new arrival. It was all a lot of fun. Sunday was more geared towards planning for this birth and how best to enjoy it. We also discussed 'me time' and how t cope with being a person as well as a parent. We also watch a DVD about giving birth to twins. I don't know the proper title it is just known as 'the Psalm and Zoya ' DVD. It is quite an inspiring thing to watch and I was happy that the children came in to watch it too. HRH seemed to thoroughly enjoy it other than a part where she tears slightly because the second baby is breach and you see a small trickle of fresh blood drip! But he is still very adamant that he wants to see our babies arrival into the world. Angel had wide disbelieving eyes right though and has asked if she can think about it! Luna seemed to hardly notice and gave very little comment!
The next class is tomorrow and I'm looking forward to it.
We have to take the children to the opticians this afternoon because the Health visitor pointed out that if they were attending school they'd had had eye tests by now so we booked in. However, they've already chosen the glasses they want while we were making the appointment and I have a feeling they'll be disappointed if their eyes are OK. Speaking on which i misplaced my glasses about a week ago and the still haven't turned up yet! Oh heck. I might have to get some more!
And this afternoon we'll be taking the children to see my Dad and we'll be cutting down his hedge which he has been worrying him for a while now so to save him some more stress Nigel has said he'll help out in the garden.

Yesterday we went to a local-ish park and spent the whole sfternoon climbing huge hills, playing ball games and racing around the play park. I managed to keep up although my legs are a bit sore today. We managed to get a good sleep last night though so I'm sure that has helped because yesterday I was exhausted and dreading today because Nigel is out gardening the country club all day and I wanted to make sure thechildren didn't get too bored. So far I've suceeded we've been tremendously busy making masks, making plasticine jungel animals, making spinners and we've begun a rain chart monitoring how many days of rain we'll have over the next 2 weeks. I felt this was apropriate after all of the floods up and down the country. (we're so lucky not to have flooded!)

Today I have felt good. Not so much as a twinge in my back although I have eaten my way through the contents of the fridge! I'm always hungry lately! Must be another growth spirt!!!!! This is me and the children at the park yesterday. Don't I look huge! How much bigger will I get???? ;o)

Even my maternity clothes don't fit well anymore!

After breakfast this morning I went back to bed for half an hour to catch up on some lost sleep. When I woke up I started sorting out the washing. When I finally got dressed at about 10:15am I noticed that my belly seemed a different shape and that I felt different too. I felt around my tummy and discovered that the baby seems to have dropped. The top of my belly feels empty and flatter which has given my lungs more room which is why I've had a more productive cough this morning. I'm grateful for that because I've had the rotten cough and cold the children have got over the last couple of days and it's hard to have a decent cough when you are heavily pregnant. Also The bottom of my tummy is very hard and full. At the moment it is hard to tell which way round the baby is but then it doesn't matter ATM. For the last couple of days I have been expecting something to happen. I have been feeling more focused on the birth and the baby has been in my thoughts a lot. I am really getting excited now, I don't really feel nervous at all!

Lately a lot of all of our energy has been going into helping HRH. His skin and cough have been improving since we have been giving hi red clover blend and following the instructions in the new booklet we have. His therapist Lin has made us a new cream to try and some aromatherapy oils to burn to help his cough. So far so good. His skin on the whole is miles better ATM but he is still suffering with sore fingers and heels. I'm sure this is a good sign as we've been told many times that eczema often goes to the extremities before going completely so we are staying hopeful.

Of course in try fashion we are constantly trying to catch up on sleep. I am feeling tired today but on the whole things haven't been too bad. Nigel is being offered work left, right and centre and also if we can get enough sponsors we are hoping he will be able to do the HET training in August. Fingers crossed about tat because believe it would really help Nigel to build his self confidence up again.

I feel that my womb has now reached my diaphram and the baby is beginning to run out of room. It seems to have settled on the right side with it's feet across as though it is sitting down. I feel regular movements and the baby still gets hic-ups but the movements are definitely not as frantic than they were. the baby seems to be gaining control of it's limbs. The movements are more deliberate now. For example. Nigel enjoys putting his head on my tummy to see if he can hear the babies heartbeat, and when he does this the baby will kick his head! Also it responds to the children all of the time. Especially Luna, but it obviously recognises all of them! I am taking a phytobiosphysics remedy called female repro, I am finding this is helping to balance my hormones and give me more energy although I haven't done my yoga for ages.

I had a midwife appointment on Friday 6th at 9am. I agreed to having the blood tests in the end because like Nigel said I'll only draw attention to myself by refusing it. I had to take a couple of Arnicas afterwards though because I don't know whether it was because I was more reluctant that unusual but she really hurt my arm this time.
Other than that everything went well. HRH really seemed to need the reassurance that the baby was ok as it seemed he had been worrying about it for a while! He mentioned it on Thursday night before bed and it made us realise how much he worries but doesn't tell us. Nigel said something about when the baby is born and HRH replied with 'Well, of course that is if the baby survives!' Angel answered first and told him there is nothing to worry about because I feel it move all of the time but he didn't seem very reassured. It is for this reason that we decided to invite the children to be at the birth. We had discussed this before but we finally decided it would be a good idea and would reassure everyone but especially HRH that pregnancy and birth are usually perfectly safe.

I have been finding it very difficult to sleep lately because I've been getting restless legs and it is beginning to drive me mad. I find it ironic that at 2pm every afternoon I could sleep for England but the moment I lie in bed and try to relax I feel twitchy and dreadful! Still perhaps it ill pass, fingers crossed!

I recently noticed that I am no longer producing milk from my left breast and only occasionally from my right breast. Luna still enjoys suckling to sleep each night and I don't mind either. I know it is common for milk to stop during pregnancy but I can't help worrying that the reason I don't have milk ATM is due to the fibroadonomas in my left breast as they are quite large and there are quite a few of them also I find it uncomfortable to latch Luna on properly and it is often uncomfortable while she suckles. I really need to do something about this I must look into this again. I have been trying to meditate regularly but so far it hasn't had much effect!